DATING TO RELATING FOR MEN – WEEKLY COLUMN– 2/1/10
Dating To Relating For Men- Advice By Mr. L. Rx
Released by AssociatedNews.US
Mr. L. Rx is the author of the popular DatingToRelating.com website and the author of the popular book “Dating To Relating – From A To Z”. Have a question? Send it to Column@DatingToRelating.com and it may be selected for answer in this column. (Sorry all questions cannot be answered.)
Question: Mr. L. Rx, I am looking for a girlfriend. I have no problem meeting women, but I always feel that they are checking me out on the first few dates, and I never seem to pass inspection. I never seem to get to the sexual stage. What do you recommend?
Answer: Well, first of all, when you are looking for a girlfriend, remember that immediate sexual gratification is not the most important thing to be considering. Sex is part of a good boyfriend/girlfriend relationship but compatibility, personality, communication and respect are by far more important issues.
Girls know that. That is why most of them won’t enter into a quick sexual relationship with a guy they are considering for a boyfriend. They want to check him out first and make sure he has acceptable qualities. Some women take longer to check you out than others. Hence, some will sleep with you after a few dates, while others it takes a few months.
If you do the wrong things during this dating “check out” stage, then they will never sleep with you. They might not even kiss you during those first dates…Horrors!
If you have gotten past that all important first date and the girl agrees to go out with you again, then plain and simple she is interested in you and you have a chance at a relationship – provided you don’t blow it from that point on.
So what do you do during this “check out” stage to end up with a girlfriend? How do you not “blow it?” Well, the easiest way to answer that question is that you do the same thing that they do. Check them out and see if you really want to get involved with them or not. And most importantly communicate that that is what you are doing to them while you are doing it.
Listen to a woman. Check her out. Ask her questions. Women love to talk. They’ll tell you everything you need to know if you just listen and ask questions. The mistake is to focus on sex and start telling her things to impress her, so she will want to have sex with you.
Qualify the woman. Do you really like her? Do you want to spend time with her? What would she be like if you did spend 24/7 with her?
If you really do like a woman and you qualify her by asking questions to get to know her better every time you see her, she will love you for it. Why? Because she will know that you are really interested in her. That it is NOT just about sex for you. That you have values. And if you are compatible, it will be obvious to both of you, as you ask questions back and forth.
Mr. L. Rx
